Focus, routines, and presence

I have a lot of trouble just enjoying being where I am. I’m always rushing off to try to do the next thing, wanting to get something done, wanting to check the next box. I was at a birthday party yesterday and could hardly focus on where I was, because I was meeting someone afterwards and I just wanted to get to that meeting so I could then get home and get more things done. Wow, right? I fortunately was able to mostly get myself under control; this is a problem I know I have and I’ve been focusing on for a while, so I did enjoy the party (and the meeting!) quite a bit. But it’s definitely a common problem.

I’m just kind of scattered in general still. I’m still not really recovered from my brush with illness, and getting back into the regular routines isn’t something I’ve quite managed yet. One of the things that was helpful this evening was doing my bread bake again; just rummaging around in the kitchen for dishes and mixing together sugar and better was a joyful feeling. I need to remember to keep hold of these small joys.

I finished up my Christmas cards today, and that’s another nice feeling. Just the feeling of connection I get when I sit down to my list of people to write Christmas cards for is something that makes the whole experience worthwhile. It may take some time to find good cards and sit down and write something on all of them, but in return you are reminded of all these people out there that you have a connection to. It’s a very different connection from a Facebook friend; a person that you exchange Christmas cards with. I wish more people still did Christmas cards. I look forward to a time where my address is stable enough that I get mail at the same place for more than one Christmas in a row.

Focus is a hard thing to come by, as is being in the moment. It’s only really when we’re in the moment that we can open up and experience connection, truly experience it. Being in the moment is the only place where we can start to make true progress.


Focusing on making Banana Nut Bread…

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